Almost 1 week smoke-free – Am I an addict?


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I looked at my chalkboard and it made me smile;  it showed a big 5! Wow almost a whole week smoke-free! Most of the time I am fine, but yesterday I had a craving and it was different. It hit me like a freight train and came from out of nowhere. It lasted a little bit longer as well -maybe 20 minutes, but still… didn’t kill me. I had more and more questions on my mind. I wanted to talk to other people like me; I wanted to find smokers like me who just quit …but where?

I searched online for hours. I stumbled over a webpage and it became very important to me But let me warn you, don’t go there if you want to continue to smoke, because this pages makes it hard to. I went there every day -I still do. I found so much information and the webpage is free and doesn’t ask for anything in return. I read a lot and a lot of it made sense, but some things I didn’t  like or just didn’t understand.  They talked about the addiction to Nicotine and explained why a lot of people relapse; does that mean I am an addict?

It’s not like I have lived under a rock for the last 35 years. Yes, even I knew that cigarettes were dangerous and even I am aware that they can kill, but not me right? I mean it’s one thing to read about it…it’s a totally different ball game to think about that each one of those stories could have been me! Maybe even will be me one day. Let’s face it…I smoked for so long, the damage is done and I can’t reverse it.

Every smoker has a story like “I know a man, he was 90 when he died and he smoked all his life”, some are even more brutal (like me) and say “I will die one day anyway, I might as well have fun”.

I didn’t like the word “addict”, I didn’t like to look at myself as being addicted to something. Not me…the others might have a problem, I don’t! Right?

Now I really wanted to talk to “real people” and I found a few support boards  for smokers. I liked one in particular, there  were people posting and talking…people like me. They all quit smoking and they all talked about it openly. I stayed hidden as a guest, but read everything they said. I wasn’t sure if I should sign up as a member. How would I fit in?

Every ex-smoker has something to say about the former bad habit..and those boards have a nice collection of shared wisdom. I am no exception to the rule…I will bother my readers (do I have readers?) later on with my new found wisdom 🙂 I found my own inspirations, my own motivations..we all tick differently …that’s what I believe!

There is not “one fits all” cure!


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