I was a great student, loved school and was a fast learner. Went to the the highest school the Gymnasium, had good grades 1-2 (A-B) no drama at all…until I decided to learn English as well. I mastered Latin and Old Greek, spoke German and Italian from an early age on. English would be just a walk in the park, such a simple language…I had been told.
I fell for it and signed up for the class. Got my first English book, went home and looked at the grammar “this is going to be easy”. Nouns have no gender, everything is neutral. No definite articles only a, an and the. “Oh, I will master this in no time.” What a smart decision I had made and pet myself on the shoulder.
Well, the grammar was indeed easy and then there came the words. Are you kidding me? One word and 100 different meanings? What were they thinking?
I was used to one word = one meaning, maybe two…but so many. Ludicrous!!!
Take the word “lost” for example:
I lost my pen = you can’t find it.
I lost my Grandmother = she passed on.
I lost my pet = you can’t find it or it passed away…no telling.
I lost time = doesn’t mean you can’t find your watch.
and many more examples. I could go on with this for hours. Some things I learned the hard way. I remember a dinner meeting when someone said “I just lost my Grandmother” and I offered “Do you want me help you find her”. The looked at me funny, very funny.
English was the land of confusion for me, so someone upstairs – with a great sense of humor -decided I had to fall in love with an American, just so I could stay confused forever. 🙂
Here is the proof, that they really all lied to me, when I was a child. The easy grammar is a trap.
WHY ENGLISH IS SO HARD TO LEARN
- We must polish the Polish furniture.
- He could lead if he would get the lead out.
- The farm was used to produce produce.
- The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
- The soldier decided to desert in the desert.
- This was a good time to present the present.
- A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
- When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
- I did not object to the object.
- The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
- The bandage was wound around the wound.
- There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
- They were too close to the door to close it.
- The buck does funny things when the does are present.
- They sent a sewer down to stitch the tear in the sewer line.
- To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
- The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
- After a number of injections my jaw got number.
- Upon seeing the tear in my clothes I shed a tear.
- I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
- I was content to note the content of the message.
- It’s a bit wicked to over-trim a short wicked candle.
- If he will absent himself we mark him absent.
- I incline toward bypassing the incline.
Which subject in school did you find impossible to master? Did math give you hives? Did English make you scream? Do tell!