I am a bad, bad blogger (?)

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bad-blogger

Something interesting happened yesterday to me in the blogging world, something, that might explain while I don’t see some bloggers anymore. I made a mistake and I have to say, I feel a little embarrassed. Embarrassed, because I didn’t follow the #1 blogging rule. I did not just not follow it, no, I bend it…broke it. I am a bad, bad blogger (I think that’s what I am suppose to say now.)

The blogging world is very polite, so let me be fair and warn you, that this post might contain some curse words and it might not be as polite as it should be. Although, I could drift into sarcasm, what will happen by accident. For this, I will ask for your forgiveness in my last paragraph.

My face doesn’t turn red anymore, mainly because it has ALWAYS the healthy, reddish color that comes with menopause, but I did feel embarrassed yesterday.

I corrected a blogger. Yes, you read right. I overstepped my welcome and left a comment on a bloggers post that wasn’t nice. I corrected an American misspelling (how dare you foreigner). I corrected it and didn’t even leave a like -what is another faux pas, because you like just about everything.

Blogging is about likes and followers. So, you read a post about celibacy after you just had wild, passionate sex with your spouse. You disagree with celibacy -and that’s alright- but please, don’t say write it. Just leave a like and say something profoundly important like “nice post” and move on. Leave the blogger and open another window to another bloggers post, that hopefully will be more interesting.

Remember: You can not say/write what you think, you can not openly have a different opinion -that’s what real life is for -if you are lucky. You are here in the blogging world to politely agree with pretty much every bullshit  well written post you read, and to promote your blog.

Now you will think “why is she writing all this nonsense” and my #1 excuse would be. Yes, you guessed it. It’s menopause, I can almost blame everything lately on Mother Natures little aging gift. I am a bitch in the making…what can I say?

No, I am writing this, because I went back to the blog after I left my comment and someone else had stepped in and stood up for the blogging friend, who was so rightfully wrongfully attacked by me. I thought it was great. That’s what friends are for. You step up when a friend gets hurt, you step up to the plate and have your friends back. I like that a whole lot. There was another blogger, who like me said what came to her mind.

Then, I read further and saw that she felt bad about it later on. She acknowledged the fact that she had corrected and disagreed with me me, and felt bad about her honesty. She called herself “a bad blogger” and I didn’t like it. Why would she call herself a “bad blogger” just because she said what she was thinking? And for Heaven’s sake, what does it make me? The double 0? Double bad?

Someone felt bad because she protected her blogging friend. Someone felt bad because of me. That’s embarrassing isn’t it? I unfollowed both bloggers (another faux pas -don’t bring the numbers down!). The first blog, because I didn’t find it interesting enough to continue reading, the other one, because I don’t like it when I make people feel bad.

I searched and researched a little bit and come to find out, that I am indeed the bad, bad blogger, I didn’t follow the rules  and never will . I found numerous pages online with blogging rules, all asking us, the writers, to be polite at all times.

I like my blog to be controversial. I don’t give a hoot about the number of followers and readers -even though I do like to look at my stats.

I believe the real word is dishonest enough the way it is. I don’t want to be dishonest in my blogging world. You see, I am part of the blogging world now (like it or don’t like it) and my part of the world is for all of you, who are not afraid to say what you think.

“Be sarcastic, be humorous and be critical” I am at times and can still be loving, witty and caring as well. If you visit my blog and leave comments, please be yourself -don’t pretend.

So, I broke a rule yesterday, because I didn’t know about it and now, since I know about, I will continue to break it every damn time I please to do so.

And now I would like to ask for forgiveness, because the language used in my post was not polite yada yada yada 🙂

bewhoyouare

Isn’t Your Face Red

When was the last time you were embarrassed? How do you react to embarrassment? 

109 thoughts on “I am a bad, bad blogger (?)”

  1. This was really funny, altough it probably wasn’t intended … I saw myself in a real s’*tfight a few months ago because I commented on a blog NOT knowing the post was concerning another blog I followed and she went completely nuts on me. It took me a long time to even put those 2 things together. Passive aggressive is probably not polite either … To cut this short, you cannot always win and there will always be people who dissect your comment until they find somtehing. Your blog is very nice, don’t let people make you feel like a bad blogger

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  6. I read every word of your post and I liked it…I really liked it. I say lots of things that people most likely disagree with and that is fine. Different opinions are what it is about and they make everyone stop and think. And don’t worry about sarcasm. I can be seriously sarcastic. I try to hold myself back! We will see how I do!!!

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    • I just saw your LIKE on the post and it made me smile. I always smile when someone likes this post, because it means there are more rebels out there -it’s not just me.
      No worried, I am fluent in sarcasm…we will get along just fine. 🙂 Good Night!

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  7. Actually, Blogging 101 Comments lessons recommend disagreement – and like Calen says -diplomacy is advised. However, I’ve disagreed on blogs that have actually invited disagreement. I try to be polite and give reasons for my position. When I agree, I get lots of attention, but they go very quiet when I don’t. I’m always disappointed as I’m hoping for a response to challenge my position – it helps my own development as a thinker. But seems the invite wasn’t that open after all.

    I’m interested in your notion of ‘blogging rules’. Perhaps it might be better to use the term blogging ‘norms’ – those unwritten codes of conduct that emerge as a community culture develops.

    I’ve become increasingly interested in the notions of individual authenticity in online communities and the more cultural aspects of the development of online communities and their idiosyncratic norms. Some are extraordinarily polite and supportive, some downright antagonistic and abusive and others almost become exclusive, developing an us and them dynamic. Bloggers develop a community base around them, that begins to shape the nature of the blogger’s blog as well as the blogger influencing the culture of their community. I think you’ve raised some interesting questions that could be explored further.

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    • I think I had a problem with “blogging politics” more than anything. People “liking” a post, just because you liked theirs. What good does that do?

      The unwritten rule to thank everybody, to be polite at all times…because it’s all about the numbers of followers and readers.
      Screw that 🙂

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  8. Well, I guess if you are a bad blogger, then I like bad blogging…and in my rookie pursuits, I am doomed as well.
    THIS exact post, is exactly why I’m going to follow your blog ;-D Can’t wait to see what other insulting things you might have to say. Hahahahah.

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  9. You are not a bad blogger… 🙂 yes I know this post is an old one.. but it caught my eye.. Which is why I read it.. and this is why it takes me hours to reply to bloggers.. because I read what I like.. and usually tell them so..
    Sending You love.. ( and you could never offend me honestly ) I just hope I didn’t offend you! xxx

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  10. We are all scared and bound by rules in todays world. You cant say this, cant do that. We can actually say and do what we want! I love this post, its truthful. I admire the truth and speak the truth in my blogs – DO NOT be scared of offending someone if you think they are in the wrong. Live you life! 🙂

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  12. OMG! There’s blogging rules too. What have we become where everything we do has to be censored? I can understand it if you were downright rude. But, to comment on someones misspelling? Cmon now. LOL!! Great post. I loved it.

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  14. Well I don’t think you are a bad blogger at all. Who on earth can take offence at having a spelling mistake corrected? Though I must confess that I have been a bad blogger myself when I once gave my opinion on a photograph. As you may remember my blogs are mainly photographic so I do understand how ‘precious’ these things can be to people, (though personally I wish more people would give me some critical evaluation of my work instead of just leaving ‘lovely’ – I mean lovely what? Light? Colour? Composition? Subject? All of these? ) so I admired the subject matter and the composition, but dared to say I wasn’t keen on some of the editing. OMG! Shot down in flames was I. Never to darken the doorstep again. OK. I learned my lesson. Either ‘like’ or move on. I was then more recently criticised for leaving negative comments on a blog – for a whole year! What? Really? How could that be? I thought I was being sympathetic, encouraging, inquisitive… and it turns out the blogger thought I was none of those things. Chastened and saddened I unfollowed. No point in pursuing that one even though I had thought we were kindred spirits. So I hear what you are saying. I cannot ‘like’ every post I read so I don’t. I comment as often as I can, and as positively as I can be. If I feel that my opinion won’t be well received I don’t comment. It is a funny old world …sigh!

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    • Don’t get me started on “blogging politics” because it makes me angry. So much BS going on.

      First of all, “Thank you” for you long comment. I never thought about the way I commented on a photo blog until now. I too say things like “magnificent” or “gorgeous” but never tell the photographer why I like. I will change that!

      Always say what you think here, so pleased to see you.

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  15. Ok so I am here about to fall asleep trying to mend my WordPress reputation that isretty much in tatters because of low traffic( due to bad friends lol and me too hehehe) but then I got hooked on reading other blogs and comments and opening up bloggers blog who commented or have interesting blog names and stumbled upon yours (confused yet?) so in a room full of Family members already asleep entry not to scream and dance due to your post. Because if I can’t be honest while I blog, where else can I be?
    Well said. Thank you very much!

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  17. I love the blogging world to bits, but what sort of rule is that that you can’t have an opposing opinion? Sure it’s good to be polite and say nice things to one another, but isn’t that the general guideline for life as well? We get along because we tend to be nice towards each other but sometimes we need to correct one another and say what we think if the other one is either wrong or just has differing opinions. If voicing my actual opinion makes me a bad blogger then I want to bad, really really bad. 🙂

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  18. I like your honesty and if anybody gets angry over being corrected in this area they seem very immature. I am not fluent in English being Danish and I treasure to get feed back on misunderstandings and misspellings. I have participated in some of the blogging courses from WordPress and they recommend to be honest in our commenting

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  19. Different opinions…..in my opinion….hahahaha are exactly what they are “Different” each person represents their own values….their outlook on life. I try to keep my opinion to myself on other’s opinions….I read what they have to say…in my mind I agree or disagree. If I agree then Kudo to that person or a “Like” or I will leave a comment. If I don’t agree sometimes I will “Like” what they posted because I respect their opinion and other times I just do nothing…..My choice always…I know there are rules and I respect rules that respect others but other than that…….I will voice my opinion and like one of your readers said……If someone doesn’t like what you or I or anyone writes they can just move forward to those that please them. Hugs P.S. In my opinion there is no such thing as a “bad blogger”. 🙂

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    • Honestly I didn’t even know there were such things like blogging rules and blogging politics, when I started blogging. Then, after a few months I did note some of the typical blogging politics and I just hated it. “I scratch your back if you scratch mine”..stuff like that.

      I just don’t fit in a (any) drawer, not even in a bad one (sigh)

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  20. When I began blogging a friend said to me it’s your blog say and write what you want. If people don’t like it they won’t come back. If they do you’ll see them quite often. I have always tried to encourage bloggers who write story and poetry because I know it’s not all that easy. I’d rather see folk keep trying than give up.
    As for rules well they are made to be bent and broken so I’m with you on that one. I don’t look at stats as I don’t really understand their significance. I write because I enjoy it. If someone reads my work and likes it great, if they comment better, if the point out a typo, which sadly happens on a regular basis, I silently curse them and myself, correct the error and pretend it never happened.

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    • Honestly, I didn’t know what blogging really was. I never expected anybody to read my blog. I don’t participate in any social medias, so nobody could find me -so I thought. I didn’t notice the “politics” n blogging at first, then they became obvious.

      That day, when I corrected a misspelling in an European word, it just crushed down on me.

      I do expect people to say what they think. That doesn’t mean one has to be rude, or unfriendly. I don’t accept name calling or bad style. But I want to have interesting followers.

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    • I thought I was alone in my opinion, when i wrote the post. Felt like I wouldn’t fit into the blogging world, because I refuse to play “the game”. Now, after the post and after so many likes and comments I know I am alone, there are many rebels out there. Nice to meet you 🙂

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  22. The reason I have been absent from the blogging world has nothing to do with anything anyone said. Am currently working to get my site transferred to my new host. If you ever say something that offends me, I am an adult. I’ll just ignore your comment. You may have had a bad day, or maybe you seriously felt that way. Again, we are all adults here!

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      • I can’t recommend it highly enough. The trick is to choose the right rules to break–the ones that don’t work, that make no sense, that drive you nuts, that won’t get you arrested–not to do it just for the sake of. I can’t see the point of playing false-nice in the blogosphere. If we’re having a conversation, shouldn’t we really talk?

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        • I meant I don’t know the life without breaking a rule. I was born and raised in Europe, between Italy and Austria. My Grandmother, the woman who raised me, told me to question everything. Her generation had seen the horrors of wwII. She had seen how much harm silence or fear can bring. “Stand up for your believes” was one of the main rules that she hammered into my brain.

          For me it’s about questioning the rules and then break them, if they don’t make any sense.

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  26. I agree with your post. I find if you disagree, your comment sometimes gets ‘lost’ in moderation or is erased shortly after you hit ‘post comment’.

    I find the ‘bad bloggers’ to be the one’s that are the most interesting.

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  27. I once wrote in the comments of another blogger, that if I don’t agree with something, or I simply don’t like the post at all – I don’t comment, I don’t “like”. I was berated by this blogger and basically told I was a bad blogger, I didn’t deserve to be in the blogging world because I didn’t voice my opinion. But I did voice my opinion (in a passive way) by not “liking” or saying anything, I just viewed. So I just passively “unfollowed” the blogger that told me off. I don’t know if it was the right blogging thing to do, but it made me feel better.

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    • I once came across a photo on Flickr that I really liked and wanted to “fav”. In Flickr, your favs make a page, which for me was a source of inspiration and learning about what makes an astonishing image. The photographer made an announcement that she was going to remove all likes that didn’t include a comment. I replied I didn’t feel qualified to comment as a beginner photographer. I could see her point though. A lot of likes are meaningless responses – you liked my photo/post, therefore I like yours, but sometimes there are other reasons. I find it hard to comment on a poem for instance. I don’t know what makes a good poem, but I know if I liked it or not.

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      • I try to comment, but just can’t do it always, especially on the photography blogs. I do comment when something is outstanding…or when I have something to say. Like you, I am not a photographer and feel that I need to be quiet. I don’t like pictures that are overly photoshopped…but who am I to judge it.

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  28. I love it. And I think I shall follow along from now on. Please feel free to be a bad blogger all over my blog. I’ll probably buy you a beer for the effort.

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  32. I do think it is important to be honest, but it is harder to give diplomatic constructive criticism. I don’t mind strong opinions by commenters or bloggers and I was once criticized for saying something negative on a blog when it wasn’t intended as negative at all. So words can be misconstrued out of context but is it our motif in commenting that is important? I actually didn’t know about their being blogging rules. It is common sense to be polite but also honest, I think, and sometimes critical where criticism needs to be said. God help us if the world becomes full of yes men! Keep your blog controversial! Common sense should draw a boundary between controversy and social media bullying.

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  33. (I wish there were some people who bother to correct my English!)

    If I press the like button it means that I really “like”the subject I’m seeing , but I can’t find a thought to express,at the moment , or don’t have the time to do it…..
    When I find nothing worth a comment or a like , I just skip to the next post…
    I don’t mean to judge , but have the right of choosing what interests me while avoiding what does not

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  34. I have to say, I am a bit disappointed. There was hardly any profanity as your intro lead me to believe. lol! Yup, be honest. In fact because being honest can be so hurtful to some, I no longer accept doing reviews for friends or family (unless I really liked it). Excellent quote there. Hope everything is going well. 🙂

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  36. I think it is okay to voice an an opinion if you disagree with what someone has written- and certainly if you are correcting a misspelling it should be greeted with a thank you! Sometimes the comments can lead to interesting discussions- just because we are blogging does not mean we have to agree. I do often take the path of “just ignore” if I disagree or don’t like what someone has written- and like you will unfollow if I find a blog to be less interesting than I originally thought, or too much of a “downer” or ranting! As the commenter above wrote- tactfulness not always agreeing are 2 different things!

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  39. Was soll ich sage, besser nichts. Heute ist ein shockierende Meldung in der Zeitung und nächster Woche niemand mehr weiss etwas darüber, schon vergessen. So ist das blogging Leben würde ich sagen, eintags Fliegen. Wir marchieren weiter trotzdem. 🙂

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  40. I dislike these blogging rules. I mean, I try to be polite at all times, but I never “like” a post that I disagree with and I’ll leave my opinion if I know the person well enough or think they won’t fly off the handle if I do. But the so-called “rules” of blogging that you pointed out are stupid IMHO, and I tend to break them as well. But if people get pissy about it, I also will move on and fuhgeddaboudit because life is too short to worry about people with such delicate feelings.

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    • Some of these blogging rules and politics are utterly nonsense. I wasn’t rude. I just happen to notice a misspelling and the European in me revolted and made me leave the comment. I think people get pissy or loose their cool, because they have nothing useful left to say.

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  41. Sometimes I can be naughty and sometimes I can be nice. I supposed Santa is pretty confused by now. It’s all good.

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  42. Sit! Stay! BAD puppy.

    I am not polite all the time. I don’t even try to be because I know I am, at heart, cranky, post menopausal, opinionated, and easily annoyed by foolishness. I don’t know what you said, but whatever it was, I’m pretty sure the world will survive your faux pas. If people had more of a sense of humor, no apology would be necessary. What, we write and don’t think anyone will ever disagree???? Really???

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    • I wasn’t rude, just pointed out a misspelling, a typical American misspelling about an Austrian “thing”.

      You are raw and honest, that’s why I like you. You can step on my toes anytime, because it will make me think :-).

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  43. I think there is room for disagreement in the blogging world. I want readers to call me out if they think I misstepped. I enjoy learning about different points of view – that are written respectfully.

    I don’t however agree with comments that are mean-spirited, and worse … cruel attacks left anonymously.

    So, I guess that’s my long way of saying, let’s continue a meaningful conversation – even if we don’t always agree 🙂

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    • You are spot one Joanne. I enjoy our conversations. I remember when I left you the “yummy” remark on your post with the geese pictures.

      I had a few cruel attacks, mainly from e-cigarette sellers and I just deleted them. It seems that my anonymous comments fly automatically in the spam section.

      I like to learn and I am always open to rethink my opinion.

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  44. I’ve always thought the politeness had to do with tactfulness, not that you had to agree with everything someone says. One of the reasons we blog is to start conversations. Doesn’t happen often, I’ll admit unless it’s with folks you’ve gotten to know pretty well. Most people probably have an opinion about a blog, but not the time to post an intelligent answer, so they hit like to let you know they’ve been there. I’ve left my share of posts that are contradictory to what the blog says, but the wording is the thing. So don’t feel like a bad blogger. We’re all learning here, after all. {{{LB}}}

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