Have a glass, screw something and bite into Jesus

sad santa

There I was in my workshop, still trying to finish up everything on time, when I thought that listening to a Christmas movie might finally help me to find the Christmas spirit….somewhere. 

The TV is a noise maker in my workroom. I can listen to it and I can still focus on my work at the same time.

It seemed like a brilliant idea at first; I knew the movie and could whistle along, when they started to sing Christmas carols.

But it didn’t last long, my little Christmas bubble burst, when I listened to some of the advertisements during the commercial breaks.

The most brilliant gift ideas this year -they actually used the word cool– are:

A wine glass that can hold a whole bottle of wine.

christmas wine glass

A cordless screwdriver that looks like a gun.

christmas screwdriver gun

A Jesus Toaster for (or by) the daily bread.

christmas jesus toaster

I stopped working and watched the commercial when it came on again.

You have to be kidding me. I don’t know what’s worse, the idea that somebody might actually buy the cool gifts or the fact that they must have made that much money, that they can afford daily, repeating commercials.

What is the perfect way to use these gifts? Drink a gigantic glass of wine first, then go around and scare the living crap out of an innocent person with your cordless screwdriver-gun and ask for forgiveness the next morning, when you bite into Jesus?

I thought I had seen it all…but far from it.

I hate to ask that question, but are people really buying these things? OK the wine glass can be a gag gift, but the screwdriver that looks like a gun, might not be a good idea, in a time where there are mass shootings everywhere.

But the worst and most tasteless gift ever, has to be the Jesus toaster. Who buys crap like that and who gets punished with a gift like that? This is just wrong on so many levels and I am not even religious.

Well, the TV is off in my workroom…screw that~!



28 thoughts on “Have a glass, screw something and bite into Jesus

  1. You are quite right… the seems to liturgically evoke the Body of Christ, as if the toasts were communion wafers or something like that …
    There are many odd things out there… One wonders what they aim at…
    Sending love… Season Greetings to you… Much love and all my best wishes. Aquileana .💫~

    Liked by 1 person

    • I think theses day they try to make money with anything and everything. Taste, style and class is not relevant anymore…just the quick Dollar. That’s at least the excuse for the ones making it, as for the ones buying is…well, there just is no excuse.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. For what it’s worth, some of these “cool gifts” and the adverts are by people who just think they have a great idea and want desperately to sell the things at Christmas. Many do NOT sell and they are left after the holidays broke, with a warehouse full of junk. I know several people who have done this. Sometimes, they deserved it. Sometimes, it really WAS a great idea that just didn’t sell. We mute the commercials because we aren’t buying anything, no matter what it is.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I just read that the Jesus Toaster flew off the shelves and I hope that is not true, because it’s just really disturbing. I hope that many of these things won’t sell and whoever came up with the idea to sell a screwdriver that looks like a gun would deserve to be broke financially as well as they already are mentally.

      I have bought two things of TV commercials. One was a total waste of money, the other was a music DVD series that I LOVE LOVE LOVE.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Seeing Jesus in toast is actually a thing. Google Jesus toast and you’ll see articles about it, including one last year in Time magazine. Neurologically, the phenomenin is called “face pareidolia.” Our brains are hard-wired to see faces in mundane objects. This toaster takes it to an absurd level, but it’s just in fun, I’m sure.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I am sure they can come up with a beautiful, scientific explanation for something as silly as the Jesus toaster and quite frankly I don’t give a damn LOL.
      I just wrote how it made me feel, when I watched it. I really believe it has to be the most tasteless present ever -religious or not.
      Boy do I hope you are right and it’s just for fun.


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