Sacrifices or love without ego?

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“Sacrifice.” It means to endure a loss, to give something up that is worth a lot, for the sake of others. It means putting someone else’s needs above your own. To sacrifice is to suffer so that others benefit from it.  The suffering part, that’s what bothers me. 

So I don’t believe in sacrifices. However, I do believe in giving and I believe in love without ego.

One of the cornerstones of life is trying to care for the ones we love. That starts when we are little and we continue to do so when we are adults. Parents make sacrifices for their children so that they will have a better life. But it’s not really a sacrifice, it is what parents are supposed to do?

Lovers make sacrifices for the loved one. Strangers come together and make a miracle happen for a person in need. Sacrificing time, money and sometimes even the own wellbeing. Gifts from the heart are not sacrifices.

Small things we do for others may go forever unnoticed and might be lost in the complexities of our world and our lives. Unnoticed, like a single drop of rain, especially if we don’t brag about it.

That drop, that single drop can nourish and bring hope. All things done for others are never lost, for even if the message or the deed was lost for the other, it was never lost to us and the wonderful way we felt.

Just to give, to help, to love enables us to learn that the true  joy is not found in receiving, but in giving.

So we might think we are just a small drop of rain, but together we can make a flood happen.

 

“Sacrifice is a part of life. It’s supposed to be. It’s not something to regret. It’s something to aspire to.”

― Mitch Albom, The Five People You Meet in Heaven


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16 thoughts on “Sacrifices or love without ego?

  1. “All things done for others are never lost, for even if the message or the deed was lost for the other, it was never lost to us and the wonderful way we felt. Just to give, to help, to love enables us to learn that the true joy is not found in receiving, but in giving.”

    Thank you for that, Bridget. I was trying to explain this to someone today, that not every good deed is done out of ego. I think that’s what you’re saying, right?

  2. I agree with you about sacrifice-I believe in giving and loving without ego is perfect. I think sacrifice turns easily into “martyrdom” people sacrifice in a way that they later regret, or feel it is too much and that takes away from the initial intention to give.

  3. intriguing post. but i think it is fallacy to believe that all sacrifices have a happy ending. going to the extreme, but very much real, there were people who made sacrifices in order to put Hitler into power, believing it was for the good. Only later did some of these people realize what evil their sacrifices released upon the world.

    also for me, sacrifice is to be used when i feel as if I am losing something i value that is greater in value — in some way or another — than the value i place on the object of my efforts. There is always an opportunity cost in every action we do. Writing this comment means I can’t be writing my own post, commenting on others’ posts, or riding my mountain bike. Do I view it as a sacrifice at this moment? No. But if I felt compelled to write this comment for whatever reason, yet by doing so I had to give up, say, seeing the poet Jane Hirshfield give a reading, then that would be a sacrifice. And as such I would have to struggle whether the sacrifice was worth it.

    • Sacrifices don’t grant us a happy ending. It would be great if that would be the case.
      I can spend days raising fund to help people in need, or spend days rescuing dogs and at the end they might still die. In the end it doesn’t make a difference.

      I do it or I don’t. I don’t believe in the suffering part. If I risk my life for a loved one or my time for a stranger, none of it hurts…it’s a choice (as you said.)

  4. So true because I think of the times when I put others first for put myself out and I don’t feel like I am sacrificing. I just feel like its what I am going to do and feel happy about the end result. I am reminded of Jesus who yes days before he died cried before God and didn’t want to suffer. When it came to all he said was forgive them for they know not what they do…

  5. You have presented a loving viewpoint. I would hate to think of my life as being sacrificed just because of doing for or giving to others. As you say that in itself brings happiness. Good post.

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