Something is going on in our house, and it’s just not right. Socks are disappearing left and right, and I would be okay with it -we all know they vanish into thin air- but I don’t like how it all goes down.
It all happens in the laundry room. Two socks go into the laundry basket -we are most certain of that- what means two socks go into the washer. Then, after an hour or two, we put the socks into the dryer, at this point we can’t guarantee if the second sock is still around, but we know for sure that only one sock comes out of the dryer. It’s a mystery that many have tried to solve. I will not even go there.
So we know where the crime happens and we all are fine with it. We accept it, it’s like we pay a “sock fee” to keep the laundry equipment happy.
What’s not so fine is the fact that it’s mostly my socks. I would guess around 80% of the vanishing socks are mine and only 20% belong to my husband.
That’s discrimination. Also, it’s always the new and funny socks that disappear, never the old ones that I want to throw out anyway.
Just last week I bought two pairs of fuzzy, little sleeping socks. They are great in the evenings when we watch TV. They match perfectly with my lounge pants, one pair is black, the other pair is pink, and I love them both so much. They are intelligent socks, they have little tiny sticky things on the bottom, to make sure that I don’t end up on my behind on my way to the fridge.
I promised to cherish them forever and then, just 1 week later, one of the black socks was gone. Poof, vanished into thin air.
Again, all my husband’s socks survived the laundry, but not mine. I get it, my husband’s socks are rather boring, he wears white or dark socks and has numerous pairs in the same style. One goes missing, he pairs it up with the next missing sock -there is never any drama involved. He seems to have things under control.
Me? Not so much. It’s the fun socks that disappear, the ones that I love, that’s why I am so upset.
I really think that taking only my socks is a form of discrimination, don’t you think? Equal sock rights for everybody!
And what’s up with selling us a pairs of socks anyway, what kind of logic is that? We all know that sock crimes will be committed, haven’t we learned a thing?
How about selling 3 socks as a unit. This way we would still have two left when one disappears. I like the idea, now I just have to make sure the public knows about it as well. There is a market for it!
Maybe I will start a SOCK PETITION?