If you come across a Mosquito in the size of a helicopter, please, be so nice and kill it. It has been in our house and bit me about 250 times in under five minutes. It deserves the death penalty -no questions asked.
My husband says it bit me because I am sweet but not anymore, it sucked the sweetness out of me.
It’s a racist Mosquito, it likes white women only. It left my friend alone, and she was sitting right beside me.
I am not sure if the Mosquito is female, but if it is, then it’s gay. It left my husband and his friend alone, I got all the attention. Lucky me!
On the other hand, if the Mosquito is male, then it’s a womanizer, I tried to get away. Not a chance!
If the Mosquito is religious, it’s not Catholic. I said, “Jesus Christ” a few times and it didn’t help, neither did it listen.
The Mosquito doesn’t like its own kind. The dogs were laying right there. That’s like serving it on a silver platter. But no, it came back to me, ignored them all night long. Not an animal lover, not at all.
There is a chance the Mosquito might be an alcoholic. I had two glasses of wine -the good stuff. I am sober now, but the Mosquito might need rehab by now.
The Mosquito is not a team player and it doesn’t play by the rules. Mosquitos are supposed to hate lemon candles, not this one, it’s immune or just a pervert.
So, now you know it all.
Please, go offline and get that damn thing. I tried, and I failed.