I have been somewhat quiet on my blog lately, questioned the sense behind it all. Blogging takes time -time that I am not sure, if I am still willing to give. Real life is waiting behind the screen, and it’s pulling me in different directions.
A voice inside me tells me I am too old -or not old enough- to spend so much time in a virtual world; especially if the virtual world is so different from the real one. Perhaps I am burned out, or I am just not sure about the direction of my blog anymore.
Everyday life has so much to offer, so much has to be done. Should I sit in front of a screen and talk about change, or should I go outside and actually be the change. Perhaps both? My blog has changed over the last 16 months. The election and politics became an important issue to me. More and more did I take a stand and made clear on which side I can be found.
I never cared about likes and followers, even told readers to unfollow me when they tortured my brain and tested my patience. Should I stop blogging or should I continue and, IF I continue, what would I like my blog to be?
Some blogs I follow have started out so interesting and have become so boring and predictable over time. Am I one of them? I fear I might be and I don’t like that at all. “You quit when you’re on top,” that’s an old sports rule that I always found to be true. I prefer to be missed, rather than overdo my welcome -if that makes any sense.
I am torn.
There are the simple pleasures that I would like to write about. The old Austrian and Italian recipes, different cultures; travel spots in Europe that can’t be found in tourist guides. There is so much in my past that I would like to share, so many beautiful places I have seen, so many great experiences I was allowed to have. But then I ask myself, “Do readers really want to know about my love for pancake soup and liver dumplings?”
And then there are the serious subjects that so many bloggers avoid. Being the “raised eyebrow” once in a while is as much fun as being the silly blogger who makes you laugh. The more I think about it, the more I see that my blog will always be all over the place. I can’t be pinned down, not in real life and not here on my blog.
I always wake up with a smile and try to keep on smiling throughout the day, but there are screams inside me and sometimes -as you all know- they have to be let out so that I can smile again.
I am taking a short blogging break! I will sort out my feeling and will then follow my gut and make a decision that will probably make no sense at all.
What can I say? That’s me!