A while back a blogger wrote about the difference between Facebook and the blogging world. She praised the HONESTY in the blogging world, and I couldn’t help but wince inside. Ever since I have not participated much, had to rethink my stand in the virtual world.
The urge for likes and readers, the number of positive posts paints a picture of our perfect little lives, and I wonder if, in reality, we all just cry out for attention. We comment on other peoples lives and expect them to do the same. Critic -no matter if brutal or gentle- is not wanted. We want to be liked, followed, praised! The statistic shows us if we succeed, even though the numbers never make sense.
I didn’t know my next door neighbor was battling cancer, but I knew a woman who I never met, had broken her collarbone. I am still confused and feel ashamed it had happened. How could I have been so negligent to reality?
At least an hour a day gets lost online and what do I gain? How much of my real life do I miss, when sitting in front of a screen? How many digital pictures will I see -and praise- before I will notice the real beauty around me?
There is no autocorrect to life -it’s up to me!
I am not willing to give up reality, I am not prepared to spend my future retirement in front of screens -big and small.
The happy Quitter! 
Powerful video! I know I am guilty of spending too much time on my computer, but not so with my phone. I think it is an individual decision whether an hour is too much or not enough time to “plug in” to social media. Someone who is house bound may need the interactions available online vs a working mom with 2 or 3 kids to raise. I think if you still have quality of life while spending that hour a day online there is nothing wrong with it. But that decision needs to be made by each individual.
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I have ‘met’ and sometimes actually MET several blogger friends. I always call them blogger friends v.s. friends to differentiate them from people I know in the real world. But to be honest, many of them are better friends than people I know from work or other parts of my life. I think it can all fit together. I don’t agree that most of us only share the pretty or happy parts of our lives, though I suppose we are likely to want to do that. But when bad or sad or simply boring things happen, many of us share those too. I DO agree that being online takes up more time than it should and I take care to stay off line enough to recognize what’s going on around me right here at home.
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I have only good contact with one blogger and haven’t met her in “real” either but consider her a friend.
I never thought to put an hour aside for my online life and I am not sure if I like the fact that I am online for about an hour a day.
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I always laugh when people tell me I am always so happy after seeing some photo I post on Facebook when I am visiting some place. I tell them it is not reality- maybe I should post a photo of me screaming at my husband so they get a better picture of what real life is.
I am busy at work interacting with people all day, have friends in “real” life that I see probably less than I would like because our lives are busy, but that lack of seeing them has nothing to do with the time I spend on social media. The fact that you didn’t know your neighbor had moved or was sick I don’t think has anything to do with being in “reality” or on social media- just my opinion- I have no interest in knowing what my neighbors are doing- we are not like minded as Joanne said- and I would rather “connect” with the bloggers I feel I have something in common with. I don’t know if it was me you were making reference to about being honest while blogging- but I do feel that way. The people I follow share the crap that goes in their lives, as do I- it is not all just happiness and flowers. It is sharing those truths about life that connects us. Being online does not take the place of “real life” connections with people, but I do believe they can co exist. ❤
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I loved the video and the reminder to go offline. I never thought I would have to put an hour a day aside for my online social life, but right now, that’s what I do. I am not sure if I like it.
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You make a very pertinent point about our lives. We can get caught up in looking at the screen for far too long. I make a point every day or so to go next door and chat with my neighbour, for I know I need to talk to real people from time to time. Its also the reason I have become involved in my local historical society and I have joined a local writers group all for the same reason, to rub shoulders with real people. As far as blogging goes, I enjoy writing and I am always flattered that anyone reads what I write. I don’t worry about likes or followers as I’ve come to learn followers are a fickle lot. I have over 700 followers so WP tells me but I only ever see a handful of them stop by. Have a great day and thanks for sharing your thoughts.
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I enjoy writing and reading as well. Perhaps that’s the reason why I continue to blog.
I think I am tired of the Daisy Downers who complain all the time and the braggers, who know it all and never make a mistake.
As for followers and readers, it has facsinated me right from the start.
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I find it’s dangerous pointing out the mistakes of others. It happened to me the other day someone suggested I had used a preposition incorrectly but they hadn’t understood the context of my piece.
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I watched this video a while back and I love it because it made question why I used to spend so much time on social media.
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I had never seen the video, found it yesterday by accident and loved it. Some of his questions hit the truth and made me think.
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Absolutely.
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I’m not sure how to interpret this post. I can’t tell if you are taking a kick at your fellow bloggers for narcissism, or if you are merely suggesting you are walking away from social media.
I’m a strong believer in taking what works and leaving the rest. We get out of anything – including social media – what we choose to put into it. Some look for a place to release their creativity, or a place to vent, or simply a desire to connect with like-minded people.
Was your neighbour a like-minded person you could relate to and have a relationship … but you chose not to? I suspect not.
We can put as much, or as little, time into life as we choose – that includes social media like anything else – reading, watching TV, exercise, etc. It is neither a panacea or the source of all evil.
I do agree with you that social media – regardless of the platform – is not an ‘honest’ place. It is merely a slice that the author has chosen to share. It is up to us to accept it or reject it. I don’t criticize others for the ‘slice’ they have chosen to present to world. At worst, I don’t respond, and that’s what I expect others do if my ‘slice’ doesn’t resonate with them.
Have you really been as “negligent to reality” as you think? In the end, we see what we choose to see.
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Well said.
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It was brutal critic on social media, all of it too often a fabricated truth.
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Love what you wrote here Joanne. All of it
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Always a good reminder. We can get sucked into the screen time so easily. Everything in moderation. I’m striving to balance my screen time, my outdoor time, my people time. Most of all, I’m content with my ‘just me’ time with no screens, noise etc.
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Being content with just being me. That’s a perfect state to be.
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Time flies in front of a screen doesn’t it.
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It’s hard to keep it just to a hour.
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I’ve had similar conversations with myself. How much of my inability to find friends in our new town in the past four years is due to the time I spend blogging/facebooking and how much is due to my less than sparkling personality? This is my safety net, I’m afraid. Maybe that’s it: “I’m afraid.”
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I applaud your honesty. Try joining a Meetup group for women your age and go and join them at least at two events.
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I’ve been going to MeetUps. I just haven’t felt a spark of friendship with anyone yet. I’ve been kind of isolated for so long that sometimes I think all of my social skills have gone out the window. I’ll keep going though, because you just never know.
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