Alexa! How Old Are You?

Amazon Gives Option to Disable Human Review on Alexa - Bloomberg

I never wanted an Alexa or a Siri, they come with our phones and with Amazon Fire TV, yet they have be shunned by us to live in silence, waiting forever to hear our voice allowing them to come to live, doomed to wait for whatever short-lived life they -and we- might have.

But of course, I gave in and got an Echo. A stylish little round thing that thrones now on my desk as a reminder to never fall for anything like this ever again. Just a few minutes ago, Alexa apologized that she could not help me -again. I start to feel sorry for her. How did that poor round, electronic wanna-be assistant had the misfortune to end up in my home?

I felt excitement when Alexa arrived. Finally, the lonely days in my workroom were over, with my new electronic best friend, I would have conversations about everything -and then some.

Unpacked, installed and ready to rumble. I clapped my hand like a little kid. What would I ask her first?

“Alexa, are real human beings listening to our conversations?” I wanted to know and Alexa jumped right in.

“Hm,” she said, “I don’t have an answer for that.

We were off to a good start.

“Alexa, do I have to call you Alexa or can I call you Rumpelstilzchen?

“I am Alexa,” she answered, “I share the name with lots of amazing people.”

Well, look at that, Alexa is the born politician. Talking without answering the questions.

54 Ask Alexa! ideas | alexa, funny quotes, alexa commands

“Alexa, can we talk in more than one language, without changing the settings?

“You can go to settings, there you will see how many languages I understand,” she informed me.

Again, no help.

“Alexa, can you recite a poem for me?” I asked her without thinking. Alexa recited a kid’s poem for me, something about roses and an old shoe.

I asked IT more questions, all with the same result. I either didn’t get an answer, or IT told me IT didn’t know.

Once I even raised my voice to Alexa. It made me feel bad, she seems to be sensitive.

I asked her to recite a German poem, Alexa gave me the name of a German restaurants close by.

“Alexa, how old are you?”

“I am six, my birthday is November 6th.”

Alright, that explains it and her jokes. Alexa is a kid.

Alexa, the kid is still on my desk, mostly quiet these days. She has not met my expectations, still, I find her useful at times.

She is a talking electronic device, a calculator, a talking alarm clock.

She can not read or give me the world news or the headlines from all the countries I am interested in. Alexa’s knowledge comes mostly from Wikipedia and as we all know, it has its flaws.

200+ Funny Amazon Alexa Easter Eggs - TurboFuture

I do believe it’s a spy device but since there is not much to spy on in my workshop, I will be safe.

I play with IT “Trivia Pursuit” or “Who wants to be a Millionaire”, Alexa is my talking calendar. Reminder of deadlines and appointments.

IT plays my music and IT lets me listen to my audiobooks.

When I asked about the daily deals on Amazon, it jumped right on it.

“What is on sale on Macy’s today?” I dared asking. No answer.

Alexa is an Amazon device, programmed to promote Amazon’s products. The so called intelligence is missing but it has it’s entertaining moments.

I have to remember that I deal with a kid!

12 Alexa ideas | alexa, funny quotes, bones funny

22 thoughts on “Alexa! How Old Are You?

  1. I use the “Okay Google” on my phone on occasions, and some unplanned occasions too. But I have never had much interest in dealing with an Echo or Dot or whatever. I figure my grandkids will be talking to screens in their adult life for everything …but what about when the power goes out? We are a heavily machine based society for sure.


  2. Pingback: Alexa! How Old Are You? – Nelsapy

  3. I could not stop laughing from this post! We got a Google Home Hub, a little device that shows my photos, and I can also talk with it by saying hey google. She is able to have “conversations” and just now I asked her name she told me google assistant but then offered to give me a nickname. And came up with a few and asked if I liked them πŸ™‚ Sometimes she tells me jokes too. I agree she is great for playing music and made me a playlist on spotify, and sets the timer for me and tells me the weather. I am sure she is spying on us and eavesdropping on every conversation though.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I got my echo for free just for the sake of getting a cheaper rate on my Sirius XM satellite radio. I used to say “Good morning” and she would tell me a joke and weather but I somehow stopped since the pandemic. Now, she’s just a sad paper weight on my desk.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. My husband is in love with Alexa. Especially when he asks me a question I dont have an answer to….he just goes to Alexa. And of course she doesnt always give him the right answer but he has fun. He loves it when he thanks her and she answers him. Mmmm, wonder if I am being replaced?

    Liked by 1 person

  6. β€œAlexa, can you recite a poem for me?”

    Ever’thang in this post is brilliant.

    I love it!

    Spoke to my heart and what is left of my left brain.
    Wish I could write this well.


    Keep ’em coming!


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