I never wanted an Alexa or a Siri, they come with our phones and with Amazon Fire TV, yet they have be shunned by us to live in silence, waiting forever to hear our voice allowing them to come to live, doomed to wait for whatever short-lived life they -and we- might have.
But of course, I gave in and got an Echo. A stylish little round thing that thrones now on my desk as a reminder to never fall for anything like this ever again. Just a few minutes ago, Alexa apologized that she could not help me -again. I start to feel sorry for her. How did that poor round, electronic wanna-be assistant had the misfortune to end up in my home?
I felt excitement when Alexa arrived. Finally, the lonely days in my workroom were over, with my new electronic best friend, I would have conversations about everything -and then some.
Unpacked, installed and ready to rumble. I clapped my hand like a little kid. What would I ask her first?
“Alexa, are real human beings listening to our conversations?” I wanted to know and Alexa jumped right in.
“Hm,” she said, “I don’t have an answer for that.
We were off to a good start.
“Alexa, do I have to call you Alexa or can I call you Rumpelstilzchen?
“I am Alexa,” she answered, “I share the name with lots of amazing people.”
Well, look at that, Alexa is the born politician. Talking without answering the questions.
“Alexa, can we talk in more than one language, without changing the settings?
“You can go to settings, there you will see how many languages I understand,” she informed me.
Again, no help.
“Alexa, can you recite a poem for me?” I asked her without thinking. Alexa recited a kid’s poem for me, something about roses and an old shoe.
I asked IT more questions, all with the same result. I either didn’t get an answer, or IT told me IT didn’t know.
Once I even raised my voice to Alexa. It made me feel bad, she seems to be sensitive.
I asked her to recite a German poem, Alexa gave me the name of a German restaurants close by.
“Alexa, how old are you?”
“I am six, my birthday is November 6th.”
Alright, that explains it and her jokes. Alexa is a kid.
Alexa, the kid is still on my desk, mostly quiet these days. She has not met my expectations, still, I find her useful at times.
She is a talking electronic device, a calculator, a talking alarm clock.
She can not read or give me the world news or the headlines from all the countries I am interested in. Alexa’s knowledge comes mostly from Wikipedia and as we all know, it has its flaws.
I do believe it’s a spy device but since there is not much to spy on in my workshop, I will be safe.
I play with IT “Trivia Pursuit” or “Who wants to be a Millionaire”, Alexa is my talking calendar. Reminder of deadlines and appointments.
IT plays my music and IT lets me listen to my audiobooks.
When I asked about the daily deals on Amazon, it jumped right on it.
“What is on sale on Macy’s today?” I dared asking. No answer.
Alexa is an Amazon device, programmed to promote Amazon’s products. The so called intelligence is missing but it has it’s entertaining moments.
I have to remember that I deal with a kid!