My husband put his cigarettes away, one day before his birthday, five years ago. He didn’t say he would quit smoking, instead he informed all of us around him, that he would take ‘An indefinite break.’ Two years after I quit, he finally had enough confidence to try it himself. His quitting process was hard to watch and so different from mine. He willed himself through the first weeks. I often found him sitting outside, face-palm waiting for a craving to go away.
While I walked away from cigarettes with ease, he showed me that not every quitter, is a happy quitter.
He had dramatic mood swings, and I often I got tempted, thought I would buy him a pack myself, just to get the happy man back who I love so much.
It didn’t last. After a few months, it was clear that he would never go back to smoking either. Today I congratulated him and also asked him if he could guess how much money his quitting saved us.
He was off, by a few thousand dollars. IF…the cigarette prices would still be $5 a pack today, he saved us $9,125.
A while back he told a friend of ours about the making of an ex-smoker, and he was brutally honest. “My wife quit out of the blue, and she made it look so easy. For two years I watched her, and listened to her teasing me, and even though my cigarettes were laying around, it didn’t seem to tempt her, so I thought if she can do it, so can I?
I snickered a bit inside. I had known that all along, but it felt good hearing it.
“It was hell for me,” he went on. “I felt lost and all I could think of were cigarettes but it got better after a while.”
Our friend who listened to both of us, still smokes’ to this day. He wants to quit, but he thinks he doesn’t have it in him.
“It’s my way to relax,” he explained to me once again, and I just laughed at him -like I always do. I truly believe if you want something bad enough, you will do it. No matter if its smoking, or overeating, or drinking -even drugs.
A friend of mine is an alcoholic, sober since 9 years, and she has every reason to be proud of herself. I wrote about here once. She drunk heavily after losing a child, even spend time in prison, and who could blame her.
I drunk every night a glass of wine for ten or fifteen years, not sure why. It was a habit, something I did without thinking, and I stopped the day when my husband had bypass surgery, and I never went back to my old habit.
I am very lucky. I am not an addict. I only know the date and year when I quit smoking because this was originally the reason for this blog, and I know the year and day of my last glass of wine, because his open-heart surgery rocked my world. The truth is neither one of the dates hold any meaning to me.
I give quit-smoking advice once a month in the basement of a church, the audience mostly AA-members who now want to give up the last addiction. Many of them are ex-junkies as well, all what is left is now is the nicotine addiction.
When I tell them about my addiction theory, they often nod.
I believe an addict is not made by using, but comes out with quitting. Millions have walked away from drugs, alcohol and nicotine with ease, others face the fight of their lives.
Not every smoker is an addict. Not everybody drinking every day is an alcoholic. You don’t know before you try to give it up!
I am proud of my husband! Very proud!
And now I have to look once again and try to find that money!
I am on day 2 of quitting at age 41 and I was just browsing some websites looking at what’s going to change physically and came across a suggestion to view your blog so here I am. I was kind of confused at how this was related to my quitting when I read your most recent post about bras and jockstraps and chuckled because my boyfriend needs a jockstrap for a surgery next weekend. How ironic I guess it was meant to be that I came across your site.
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I quit in 2014 and started my blog then. The early entries can be found under “Quit smoking”. I hope all will go will with your boyfriend’s surgery.
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I want you to stay quit!
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Thank you
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Congratulations 🎉
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I had my first cigarette at the age of 8, smoked regularly from 14, changed to a pipe at age 30 and put down my pipe and tobacco on 1 October 2000, at age 52. I left them in the kitchen for many weeks until I threw them away. I still occasionally pause to smell the smoke from a pipe smoker and sigh! I am a smoker who paused 20 years ago!
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My husband started with 9, started regularly with 12 and quit before his 57 birthday.
A 20 year pause is something to be proud of my friend.
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those savings are nothing to scoff at wow, one of the hardest things to do as well! takes a lot of self control and determination
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The savings are mind-blowing. With my ‘quit money’ we saved over 20K. I always joke that I don’t know where it went, but actually I do, we had all of a sudden more spending money -and so we spent it. 🙂
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