Recent events brought to my attention, that I might not live to be a hundred as I planned. I mean don’t get me wrong, nothing has changed, I still plan on sitting on the porch of an assistant living home – high up in my 90’s. I will be listening to “Uprising” by Muse -just to rock the boat- and my husband will be right by my side, sipping his watered down beer through a straw.
We will rock together, that’s the plan, but life has the tendency to look at my plans and change them exactly then, when I think I have it all figured out. Been there, done that!
So I sat down and started to write my Living Will, even added things that should be in my last will -if I would have one. I don’t want to be buried in soil and I don’t want to have a memorial service. Instead spread my ashes on a place where I can see natures beauty and have a memorial party on my birthday.
You can have all my organs -should be taken out before the cremation- but you can’t have my face or my brain (both are personal).
Then I finally wrote down everything what the Living Will is all about; how I want to be allowed to die. I continued writing down my wishes about live support and resuscitation and all of a sudden I stopped. “Honey, why is it called a living will, when everything has to do with my death?”
No answer…just a look form my knight-in-shining armor.
Think about it, I am not writing down how I want to live, I am making a list on how I wish to die and how I wish to be treated after my death.
Shouldn’t we rename that thing and call it “Death Wish?” I got another look when I told him about my idea, what made me laugh out loud.
We have this life-and-death thing so often wrong. We call it prolonging life, while we actually prolong death, when we force people to continue to suffer with fatal diseases. We call it a living will, when we talk about our death.
It was actually an enjoyable experience to plan everything before and after my demise. “Que sera sera…what ever will be, will be,” but now I have a say in it and I go figure…I like that.
Love Doris Day! She was a REAL dog person! We have our funerals all planned out and our services and plots all paid for. I don’t worry about it any more. I did change one of my songs I wanted awhile back, however. I decided I wanted to go out to “Moon River” from my Andy Williams cd. 😀 What you said makes perfect sense, btw. It should be a Death Wish!
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Moon River is a nice song.
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Wise post!
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A living will is important- but must be witnessed and signed and available if the time arises and is needed. My mother in law was taken to the hospital unexpectedly and her living will was at home someplace and her wishes not honored as action needed to be taken immediately. Slippery slope. A health care proxy is important if a person can not make decisions about their health (due to loss of consciousness or whatever) and a person is appointed to do so. Different from a living will and necessary
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We made a will years ago.The lot goes to the surviving partner who decides then what to do next. No worries after both of us are gone. It will all be beyond worry. (just keep off the grass)
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Here it is called a living will, but it has nothing to do with the last will or material things. It’s all about how we want to die or what we will allow if we end up in a hospital.
As for what we have, well it’s just the two of us..so no headache there.
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Oh, I see. Yes I made sure I don’t want to survive living with being fed through a hose while comotose and signed a letter to that effect.
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Garry’s also real touchy on this subject, but we have health care proxies. Not living wills, but we are each well aware of what the other wants. We are planning to die together in a simultaneous burst of light. That’s the plan, anyhow. Reality, take a back seat, please.
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My husband didn’t want to talk about it either, he thinks he is superman, because I told him so. 🙂 He came around when I started talking about it. We both wrote a living will, because what if something happens to both of us at the same time and the other one is not able to speak up. It’s only us, we don’t have children, so there is nobody else.
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You are right. It should be titled My Death Wishes but only the brave would sit down and write that out. Death and Wish are words most people never want to see in the same sentence.
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I know, I am weird that way. Playing with words, or thinking about words and their meaning is or was part of my job for many years. I guess that’s were it comes from.
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Hi, this was a great read and very thought provoking. With all the celebrity deaths lately I have been thinking a lot about my own mortality too. Perhaps I need to actually post my thoughts on this too. =) Thanks for the push in this direction…now I know I am not the only one thinking about this. =)
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You’re welcome. Thank you for stopping by and reading my 2 cents worth 🙂
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=) Not a problem..happy to keep peeking in on your blog and seeing what’s new.
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I wrote mine out a couple of years back when my lungs started to not work. I need to update it. I know this was probably a rhetorical questions, but it’s called a living will because you make it when you’re very much alive and not staring death in the face. And we already had a name “last will and testament” for the other will that says what to do with all of your belongings and whatnot. Which reminds me, I need to update that one too. I keep waiting on the hubs to get his stuff in order but he doesn’t want to. He thinks it’s bad luck… another reason to call it a “living will” we here in the USA don’t like anything associated with death, it’s icky and gross. ^_^
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It was a rhetorical and a humorous question about something dead serious 🙂 I honestly think the name “Living will” is humbug, mainly because I doubt anybody has written a last will when dead. 🙂
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Excellent post, and one that should be heeded. I have had it in the back of my mind to prepare a living will for quite awhile now. Like you, I plan to live to 100 (or 103, like my great-grandmother), but life doesn’t always go as we plan.
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I had in on the back on my mind for a while as well. It actually felt good to put my wishes in writing.
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